My Kid is Smarter Than Your Kid

by Alaina on December 10, 2012

A crowd of college students at the 2007 Pittsb...In the world today much of what we do is about competition. I have posted before about my view on Moms constantly in competition and battling each other. Our kids are often viewed as a little part of our ego walking around. We probably think a lot of things that we don’t dare actually say out loud. My son is the best on that baseball team. My kid is smarter than your kid. I am a better Mom than you are. A lot of times the things we pat ourselves on the back for as Moms are about things that really do not matter though, do they?

As homeschool parents though we do connect ourselves so closely to our kids talents, especially academically. Do I have anything to do with how much my kids love history, I hope so. Do I have anything to do with the fact that the kids score pretty well on their standardized tests every year, probably a little.  It is one more aspect of our kids that we take pride in and because of this I think that we push them even further. It can also be very stressful because if we are going to take responsibility for our kids’ education we are also responsible for how well they do academically, right? If they succeed we were successful, if they fail, we have failed. It should be something taken very seriously because we would never want our kids to fail in life because of us, right? We want our kids to be a bragging right, something to be proud of and I know homeschooling parents are not the only ones who feel this way. All of us as parents want what is best for our kids and there is nothing wrong with that but I guess we have to remember what exactly IS important in the long run. Of course we want them to be smart, successful adults. I want my kids to receive an education that can prepare them for whatever it is they decide they want to do in life. Being smart and well educated does allow you certain benefits in life and I am sure puts you on the path to success. But something I read the other day reminded me that being “successful” in life is not all about their education, career, etc.and not wanting our kids to fail should extend way beyond the borders of their academic life.

When my kids are grown adults is it really going to matter if they memorized their multiplication facts at age 7 or age 10? Am I still going to be bragging that my son started reading at age 3? A friend recently told me about the organization called Celebrate Calm. I have not had the chance to fully peruse their website yet but have been following them on their Facebook page for a while now and their status this past week caught my eye and was a great reminder to me especially as a homeschool Mom so I thought I would share it with all of you.

We spend so much time teaching our kids academics. We fight over homework and get stressed over bad grades. School is important. It is. But it’s not the most important thing. I know a lot of very bright people with good jobs, but their relationships with their spouse or kids isn’t healthy…and they are absolutely miserable.

Are you slowing down life enough to teach and show your kids how to have healthy relationships? Relationships characterized by respect, healthy boundaries, emotional vulnerability, honesty and trust.

Your kids can google the periodic table. But they can’t use technology to handle conflict, show empathy or show self-respect. Realign your priorities to focus on what’s most important.
It is a good reminder about what really matters. If there are any things about my kids that are going to be worth bragging about when they grow up, I hope they will be things like the fact that they are compassionate, kind, generous, well rounded, respectful and loving people.

 

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